Saturday, December 11, 2010


Sometimes I just lie (or is it lay? I can never remember and even when I look it up, it doesn't make sense to me) here in complete awe that I am still pregnant. After so many tears and prayers and praying through tears it looks like it's finally going to happen. Even in my darkest moments I had a peace deep down inside me but I would rarely acknowledge it for fear of ushering in a hope that wasn't going to stay. But here I am...29 weeks and 2 days pregnant. There is no doubt in my mind God's grace is the reason but I know that probably sounds ridiculous to those who have also prayed and still have empty arms. I know how you feel, I prayed for Sarah's healing--as did many, many others--for a week and even though she was perfectly healed, it certainly didn't happen the way I wanted it to happen. Not a day goes by that I don't cry for her; that I don't long to sit beside her incubator and read On the Night You Were Born one more time. I have been there and to be nearing life on "the other side" is completely surreal. It would have never been possible were it not for God's grace, faithfulness, unending love because without him, I simply would not have had the strength to go forward.

I had another weight measurement on Wednesday and the baby is growing which is fabulous news! She's still on the small side but as long as she shows two weeks' growth every two weeks, everyone is happy. Yesterday when I had my ultrasound I saw one of the high-risk fellows I met on one of my many visits to L&D. He said he's been following me through their weekly team meetings and is thrilled for us. He also mentioned that he never expected me to make it to 28 weeks. Last week another doctor told me the same thing only it was during an ultrasound and she said, "She looks great! I have to tell you, I was very worried about this baby." I'm so glad they didn't tell me that earlier!

Our next big goal is 32 weeks but I'll still be thrilled to make it into the 30's on Thursday but we have set our BIG goal at 36 weeks because that is magic age when babies are not required to go to the NICU. Anything after that is icing on the cake. Speaking of icing and sugary goodness, let's talk gestational diabetes.

GD and bed rest are not friends. I was controlling my sugar levels very well with diet but after I lost weight for the 3rd week in a row, someone had the bright idea to check for ketones in my urine. I had them. Long story short: I'm on insulin to control the glucose levels so I can eat more carbs. To tell you the truth, it's been incredibly liberating and I'm no longer hungry which, apparently, can be worse than having high glucose levels. All the GD ladies on the antepartum wing see endocrinologists from a nearby diabetes research and treatment center who specialize in GD. A few days ago I asked how it was possible that I was so borderline on my test and so clearly a GD (remember, were it not for the stricter standards they use here, I would have passed the test without issue). She told me they estimate nearly 50% of GD cases go undiagnosed! I also really appreciate that she takes all of my information into account (e.g., size of the baby) when ordering and adjusting my insulin dosage.

Sadly, not all is well in the hospital. They've had to cut the food service employees schedules and now there are only 4 people per shift as opposed to 6*. It's a lot more work for them. If you would like details, I can provide them. People talk. Unfortunately my least favorite food service lady is still here way too often. The other day she was picking up my tray and, as usual, didn't bother to knock so she walked in on my doctor performing a breast exam. I gave her an annoyed look and she said, "Oh, I've seen it all working here." That might be true, my friend, but I don't think the same is true for the husband of the patient across the hall who also happened to catch the peep show.

*All things considered, I'm glad they chose to cut employees in this area rather than, say, nurses.


N said...

I am so so so thankful and happy for you! I hope she stays place and you both stay healthy for many more weeks. :D

Marie W said...

Congrats on getting to 29 weeks! 30 is right around the corner (literally). Keep the good news coming about that precious baby girl. Continuing to keep you both in prayer.

Rachel said...

Yay for 29 weeks!!! I am so excited that you'll be in the 30s as of Thursday!

Sorry to hear about the GD but glad that you've got a good team monitoring you.

AKD said...

Lady, I am so grateful for every single day she's in your belly! :)

We had a member of the cleaning staff who walked in two days in a row while I was nursing... I was not happy at all.

MrsH said...

This is great news! I have been watching your journey and have been worried for you, but now I know that you will have a strong baby out of this pregnancy. Good job hanging in there.

AdventureMom said...

I am so happy for you! I'm actually tearing up a little bit, in a very very good way. And I must say, at least in your posts and updates you are handling weeks and weeks of bedrest better than anyone I have ever known. Keep up the good work!

Michele said...

How I remember the days of GD and bedrest... How they sucked... But you are doing great! And what an awesome milestone you've hit!!!