Tuesday, January 26, 2010

What to Do Now?

I had an appointment today to check my endometrial lining (it needs to be nice and comfy for the embryos) and it's looking very good. Apparently the Death by Estrogen gel I apply three times a day is doing it's thing. Before I got to this point, however, I had an EKG.

When the doctor came out and told us she wanted me to have one, I felt reassured that everything would be deemed normal and I would have some peace of mind. But then as I started thinking. What if my blood pressure is too high and I have to cancel the cycle? What if they let me continue on with the cycle but my blood pressure becomes an issue later? What if? What if? What if? By the time I was called for my EKG, I was anything but calm. My blood pressure was anything but normal--I knew this much before the test was conducted. I tried to relax with deep breaths but nevertheless it was high. I don't know how high but TOIAW asked her if it was "very high" and she said, "no, a little high." I never got a definitive answer on what my blood pressure was (actually, I'm just assuming it was my blood pressure, it might have been my pulse) but I got dressed and took the results back upstairs to my doctor's waiting area. I gave the EKG printout to the receptionist and I thought I saw her take it into the doctor so when my doctor still hadn't called me back in 10 minutes, I was sure it was over and she was trying to find a way to tell us. When the receptionist finally led us in to the exam room, I saw the test results in her hand: Huge. Relief. I then had an ultrasound and got the news I mentioned before.

Then it was time for the internist to come in and read the EKG results. He wasn't alarmed--said there were no major abnomalities--but he did prescribe a small dose of medication that I'm supposed to take for a week or so until the transfer. After that, I have to switch to an herb supplement if it's still a problem. I'm taking half a pill once a day but if my resting heart rate is above 80bpm, I'm supposed to take the other half as well. Yesterday this wasn't a problem--even without medication--but from about 3 a.m. on it's been an issue. I was out and about all day and didn't take the pill until a few hours ago and so far I'm just a bit over 80bpm which either means the medication isn't doing it's job or things are getting worse.

I have the EKG results and I'm considering taking them to the embassy doctor's tomorrow or Thursday to see what they say and maybe check my blood pressure while I'm there. Or maybe I'll just wait and see what my pulse is and how I feel. I don't want to be paranoid, I just can't help it. The first thing I need is a good night's sleep which is something I did not get last night due to anxiety about my appointment today. And I know I need to relax so I'll try to do my best with that. Why is having a baby such a complicated endeavor for me?

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