Monday, July 28, 2008

Cave Dwellers

Last week the daily high temperatures were in the 60's (low 60's, I might add) and this week the forecast is for the high 80's. Normally I wouldn't care so much but I have one medication that cannot get too hot but it's also sensitive to cold so it cannot go in the refrigerator. I have all the shutters closed which gives our house a nice "Go away, we don't want any" vibe.

I spent most of the weekend in bed with a killer headache but that seems to be getting better. I suppose it's from the medication. All in all, the medication has seemed far worse this time from the injections to the side effects but it's not that bad, really. If I were working or had things to do, it would be a problem but it's hard to complain too much when I'm just sitting around the house.

Mentally I've had my moments but it's been more good than bad. Yesterday TOIAW's best friend called to tell us his wife had a baby whom they named after TOIAW. I was genuinely happy for them and it didn't bother me at all. Last night, however, my head hurt really bad and TOIAW asked if there was anything he could do and I said, "Make it so that I don't have to take all these drugs in order to have a baby," and even though I meant it as an attempt at humor it hit me like a ton of bricks and I cried and cried. Considering the amount of hormones I'm injecting, emotional moments are to be expected.

Tomorrow is my first ultrasound and bloodwork appointment. I'm much more anxious about it than I expected to be. I just assumed everything would work last cycle and I think that is why I'm much more cautious this time. It also doesn't help that I don't have much to distract me from thinking/dwelling on it. Every now and then when I move I can feel a little something in the ovarian region so I do think something is going on in there. I'll just feel better when I get confirmation of that!

No comments: