Friday, September 21, 2007

Dear Princess Poopsalot,

Although I am very much enjoying your current couch-snuggling-with-Mommy phase, do not for one minute think this somehow helps me accept your recent murderous activity. Yes, I saw the mouse you hunted and killed yesterday. It was hanging out of your mouth (we also need to work on eating like a proper lady, but it would seem this is a more pressing issue at the moment) and was quite difficult to miss. I'm sure you saw me heaving off to the side. That was a result of a combination of emotions and events including hearing your "crunch" the mouse, seeing your delight upon having bagged another kill, and, of course, the thought that my sweet baby puppy could do such a vicious thing to another living being.

Now I know what the vet said at your check-up this week: There is no harm in you eating mice. He even mentioned a Disney movie about wolves in Alaska who survive all winter on mice alone (I'm not sure if you heard that part because the technician was too busy chasing you through the clinic after you realized that needle she pulled out was for you). That's all well and good for the wolves, Baby Doll, but they are wild beasts. You, Darlin', are a domesticated animal! More importantly, your mama is not the kind of mama who can stomach the thought, much less the sight, of her precious puppy eating vermin (as evidenced by my reaction yesterday). I know you have very few boundaries (we'll blame Daddy for that), but I'm going to have to put my foot down here: One more mouse and you are only walking on the city streets.

I trust this is the last time we will need to visit this issue.

Always,
Your Loving Mommy

P.S. I know you probably don't like being called Princess Poopsalot in a public forum such as this, but Mommy doesn't want to use your real name so as to protect our anonymity. And, as you well know because we've told you on numerous occasions, you poop more than any five puppies combined so the name is quite fitting.

1 comment:

The Gutsy Mom said...

Hey, as long as she does her pooping outside, I say she can poop to her heart's content. Just no more vermin-eatin', that's just downright un-lady-like.